Saturday, December 29, 2007

Don't kidnap my dog! Take my kids instead.

Monday December 24th, 2007 – Once again, Vladimir Putin, President of the Russian federation, has given me material for a blog. Russia announced that they will compete with the United-States GPS and the European Galileo satellite systems with their very own Glonass system of 24 satellites by 2009. Putin then exclaimed he will tag his pet Labrador ‘Connie’ so that he will be able to find her by satellite no matter where it is. The butcher of Grozny seems to have a soft spot for his dog who attends top-level many presidential meetings.

I was simply amazed that this impromptu piece of news was on the BBC News main page for 4 days. The ‘news’ only contains a few quotes and a small description of the satellite program. It seems as though the BBC News folks are as fascinated by Vlad as I am. I also find it amazing that he holds the dog with such esteem yet we have NEVER heard about his wife of 25 or about his two daughters.

For once, Putin is not so unique in his eccentricities; many heads of state have affectionately paraded their pets in the public eye. Some have treated these pets with love whilst butchering human lives. To this day, some people remember the pets more than the spouses or children of these leaders.

Using a backwards chronology, here are some fine examples of ‘royal’ pets.

William Jefferson Clinton AKA ‘Slick Willy’ was United-States President for 8 years (1992-2000). If it weren’t for his boyish grin and his misplaced cigars, we would probably remember his pet cat ‘socks’ a little more. Socks spent the presidential terms touring hospitals, retirement homes and schools as a ‘good will’ ambassador. An official investigation was also launched into the use of government resources to answer the cat’s fan mail.

Elizabeth Alexandra Mary of Windsor AKA ‘HRH Elizabeth II’ is the currently ‘of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland and of Her other Realms and Territories Queen, Head of the Commonwealth, Defender of the Faith’ (1952-today). She owns 4 Pembroke Corgi dogs. They are truly ‘royal’ dogs in that they are as pampered as the Queen herself. As it were, they are constantly ‘hounded’ by the media (horrible, horrible pun).

Franklin Delano Roosevelt AKA ‘FDR’ was United-States President for a whopping 13 years (1932-1945). His legendary Scottish terrier, ‘Fala’, has been immortalized along with his master as a bronze statue in Washington DC. Fala was a de facto part of the presidential image. He accompanied the president at the Yalta and Quebec conferences during WW2 and a short film was made about his life in the White house.

Adolf Hitler AKA ‘Tiny mustache’ was Chancellor and President of the German Third Reich (1932,1933 - 1945). He had a pet German shepherd named Blondi throughout his reign. This cruel man also seemed to have a soft spot for the dog that he bathed and slept with. Blondi was allowed a last cyanide meal in the Berlin bunker before Adolf shot himself.

Annibale Francesco Clemente Melchiore Girolamo Nicola della Genga AKA ‘Pope Leo XII’ was the leader of the spiritual world for 6 years (1823-1829). His pet cat, ‘Micetto’, practically lived in the Pope’s robes and was present for every papal function. Leo is now dubbed ‘eccentric’ yet I have yet to find a Pope that isn’t. He profoundly confused the finances of the Vatican yet he lived a very frugal reign…presumably, so did the cat.

Alexander II of Macedon AKA ‘the great’ was ruler of a short-lived universal empire (330-323 BC). A legendary and probably false tale recounts the taming of a horse. At the age of ten, Alexander tamed the wild black stallion by realizing it was afraid of its own shadow and thus turned it towards the sun. Bucephalus, as the horse was called, followed the king to the ends of the known world for 20 years.

I think we should pay more attention to how these leaders chose and treat a pet and then rub their noses in it when they assign the words ‘mindless animals’ to the Jews or massacre the Chechen population.
.
(Pictured: Socks the presidential cat - Connie the soviet pooch)

End.

Friday, December 21, 2007

Look mommy! I tied my shoe all by myself!

Thursday, December 13th 2007 – South Korean ‘scientists’ have successfully cloned cats that glow in the dark. Through the manip- ulation of a particular gene, the cats are born or ‘xeroxed’ into existence with a protein that becomes a dull red in the dark. This extra- ordinary accomplishment (up there with penicillin and electricity) is allegedly the first step in furthering the genetic sciences. The ‘scientists’ affirm that: ‘The ability to manipulate the fluorescent protein and use this to clone cats opens new horizons for artificially creating animals with human illnesses linked to genetic causes’. This is true in the same way that buying a pound of cement is the first step towards building the Empire State Building.

I apologize to the South Korean ‘scientists’ for mocking their discovery, they must understand that I am especially mocking the effort poured into this endeavour and the great amount of pride they take in its accomplishment. An undisclosed amount of financial investment and time were spent in the goal of creating glowing cats. They call it a pioneering marvel for science, I call them GLOWING CATS! Nevertheless, you will excuse me if I was not surprised because I had read about the ig Nobel prizes a few months ago.

The ig Nobel prizes are given to the scientific breakthroughs or studies, in various fields, that offer the least amount of scientific promise. They ARE actual science yet will make you almost speechless through their uselessness. I use the word ‘almost’ because you will still be left saying …why? why? ....w…why? For example, in 2007, for aviation – the scientist who won, discovered that a hamster can recover from jet lag more rapidly when given Viagra. For Physics, the winners conducted a theoretical study of how sheets become wrinkled. For literature, a woman performed an extensive study of the word ‘the’. Finally for linguistics, my favorite, three scientists discovered that rats sometimes can’t tell the difference between Japanese spoken backwards and Dutch spoken backwards. Once again, these ‘breakthroughs’ make us laugh yet we must not lose sight of the fact that massive amounts of money and time were used up by a, let’s be honest, utterly fruitless pursuit. Some less humorous examples can also be historically cited.

When we talk of useless scientific experiments and add the epithet ‘cruel’, the Nazi regime of Germany (1932-1945) comes to mind. Apart from Doctors C. Clausberg and J. Mengele, a slew of shady physicians experimented on human subjects using a simple methodology of ‘trial and error’. For example, 1000 subjects at Dachau camp were given nothing but sea water to drink to see the effects and to randomly try counteracting the effects with various substances. They developed the cheapest way to sterilize a woman, namely to inject their uterus with acid. Their other random attempts at sterilization included massive amounts of x-rays, surgery, silver nitrate, iodine… Also, many subjects were deliberately injected with different poisons or shot with poisoned-tip bullets. This was not to see how much time the poison would take to act since the subjects were killed shortly after the administration, if they survived the injection. The autopsies divulged…..absolutely nothing relevant.
I am not comparing glowing cats with Auschwitz THIS time. I am simply demonstrating 1 of the 2 reasons I have observed for which people would run useless experiments. The first is ‘just for kicks’. The Nazi officers (Sturmabteilung, Scutzstaffel) were sadistic and psychopathic (75-90% of them according to various studies) and thus the experiments were easily justified in their thirst for blood, even if they are hiding behind a scientific justification. The second reason, which probably applies more to the glowing cats, is pure curiosity combined with ignorance. Humans have a compulsion to know things that they don’t, to the point of researching trivial things. The ignorance factor is a lot less pronounced today since we have researched, at least partially, most things that have any importance on our daily lives. It wasn’t always so.

Further back in history, the first medical breakthroughs were also largely conducted with a ‘trial and error’ approach. Trepanation (drilling of the skull to remove a fragment) was widely used from Antiquity to the Modern period to relieve pressure of excess blood. They tried bleeding the patients everywhere and the head worked the best; probably because the hole relieved pressure on the brain that had swelled with various infections. Furthermore, Leonardo da Vinci (1442-1519) was among the firsts to pop open the human body and give a tentative function to all the weird sacs he found; the muscles were red because they were stained with blood. The blood, of course, comes from food… Finally, my favorite treaty of human remedies comes from the Greek, Pliny the Elder (23-79 AD) in his Natural History (77 AD). This gem gave us the obvious treatment for headaches in women, fumigation of the uterus. Also for hemorrhoids, he suggests a nice enema of herbs and mud. I am guessing most of Pliny’s experiments involved doing something random and if the person got better, what he did works.

Whether for reasons of cruelty or curiosity, the magnanimous level of knowledge that we have achieved in 2007 has marginalized the potential of original experimentation. We are thus treated to glowing cats and are told that it is a ‘breakthrough’.

(Pictured: Leonardo da Vinci's anatomy of a man - Nazi Dr. Josef Mengele - Glowing cats, ie: the same result as when you put a flashlight under their belly)

End.

Saturday, December 8, 2007

Oil is a four-letter word

Friday December 7th, 2007 – An oil tanker has ruptured off the coast of South Korea, leaking 10,000 metric tones of crude oil into the yellow sea. It was struck by a passing barge during ideal weather conditions; the ensuing slick presently covers over 20 kilometers of water. An emergency ecological operation was launched earlier in the day yet any efforts to avert this complete disaster will be purely symbolic.

Maritime oil transportation, in my opinion, is no safer today than it was 50 years ago. In fact, the increasing enormity of ships, the rising traffic in main commercial straits and the rising price of the barrel all contribute to the construction of money-saving mega-tankers bumping up against each other as they slowly make their way to a Western refinery. Presently, the straits in the Persian Gulf, Red sea, Yellow and South China seas are the most congested commercial paths on the planet. Areas that can’t exactly afford the effects of an oil spill. If these oil tankers can be sunk by a simple barge on a sunny day, perhaps we should rethink this method of transportation. Don’t get me wrong, I am not offering a solution; no current method of transportation would be able to even come close to the efficiency and cost-effectiveness of the tanker. On the other hand, we have to be willing to deal with these disasters of epic proportions until will develop a solution.

At this point, some of my regular readers will be screaming out ``hypocrite!`` at the top of their lungs for I am not an environmentalist and even have a profound conviction that ecological concerns have slowed down the development of our civilization by impeding on it with frivolous preoccupations (and guilt). I am simply stating the social and economic implications of these much-too-frequent oil spills. Firstly, the national resources that will be rerouted to clean the water, sanitize the coastline, save the marine life and go on a massive ecological media blitz will amount to an extraordinary sum of capital in a region riddled with poverty, famine and disease. Secondly, the massive amount of coastline and marine life affected by the spill will render destitute the hundreds, even thousands, of workers that depend on fishing for basic subsistence and/or small exporting businesses. Being a peninsula with a population density of close to 500 people per square kilometer, the seas around it provide the only agrarian outlet for the majority of the South Koreans.

All media (that is, all media that isn’t hell bent on showing us that the mall killer from Omaha was justified in killing people for media recognition), will assign the epithet of ‘ecological disaster’ to this ‘Hebei Spirit’ oil tanker spill yet, as I have shown above and affirmed through my beliefs, the ‘green’ factor is a detracting element that prevents us and international organizations from focusing on the real social end economic facets of the disaster. This has also been the case in the past.

On March 24, 1989, an Exxon oil tanker struck a reef and excreted 11 million metric tones of oil off of Valdez, Alaska. To a much more marginal degree, the inhabitants of Alaska’s southern coast were, and still are, heavily affected by the economic implications of a ruined coastline and wasted marine resources. I say to a lesser degree because the standard of living in Alaska permits a diversified economy that could cushion this loss of resources. Nevertheless, all media coverage was about the limping baby seals and blackened rocks. Brigitte Bardot can save all the baby seals she wants but I think, once again, famous people missed the point and prevented the focus to be directed on the real problems of the region.

All in all, environmentalism is at the very top of Maslow’s pyramid of human wants and needs. People will always have to eat, drink and procreate before they can worry about the health of shrimp and the colour of rocks.
.
(Pictured: The Exxon tanker in Alaskan waters - the Hebei Spirit off of Taean, South Korea)

End.

Saturday, November 24, 2007

National treasure to just plain awkward

November 21st 2007 – Singer and songwriter Neil Diamond finally revealed that his 1969 #1 hit ‘Sweet Caroline’ was actually inspired and about president John Fitzgerald Kennedy’s last surviving child, Caroline Kennedy. Diamond (69) revealed this to Kennedy at her 50th birthday celebration via satellite link. You now have all the data necessary to figure out my problem with this declaration that has been branded cute, ‘sweet’ and a great honour. SHE WAS 12 AT THE TIME!

Furthermore, Diamond went on to explain that the inspiration from the song came from a picture of young Kennedy (9 years old) riding a pony in a tabloid newspaper. If we stick to the title (Sweet Caroline), it evokes a celebration of a Kennedy princess full of innocence and unblemished by the geopolitical context she was born into. Then again, if we analyze the lyrics, and I mean graze over them since it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to get my point, things take a turn for the worst. ‘But now I look at the night-and it don't seem so lonely-We fill it up with only two-Hands, touchin' hands…Warm, touchin' warm-Reachin' out-Touchin' me-Touchin' you-Sweet Caroline-Ta ta ta…’, my mind is screaming IT’S WRONG yet my foot is still tapping. Damn that catchy tune. It might be a joke yet the lack of media interest in this story and the fact that we can’t find this 3-day old story on any major news site anymore (CNN, MSNBC, BBC), makes me want to search Neil Diamond’s computer…just to be on the safe side.

Some people may say: ‘it was different back then’ yet it NEVER EVER has been. I don’t care if it was 2330 years ago that Aristotle befriended (please imagine my air quotes for that word) a young Alexander the Great, the acts and attractions remain very, very wrong. I have to say I am not surprised at the lack of American reaction because a patriot can do no wrong. Some of the founding fathers of North America have been serious cradle robbers.

Founding father of Quebec City and some more of the first settlements in Canada 400 years ago, Samuel de Champlain, married one Hélène Boullé. He was in his thirties and she was 12. The only thing of importance that was ‘different’ back then was that the average age of puberty was 16-17. SO WRONG! Later, during the American Civil War, Captain Russell Conwall was ‘attended to’ by a 16 year-old Johnny Ring, his official job was ‘safeguarding the Captain’s saber’. Giggle but WRONG!

I do hope Neil was kidding and didn’t weigh his words yet we can’t be too careful in a society where the prisons are filled with sexual predators.

(Pictured: Samuel de champlain - A shifty Neil Diamond)

End.

Monday, November 12, 2007

Darn terrorists ruined my democracy

November 3rd, 2007 – President Pervez Musharraf of Pakistan has declared martial law, sequestered the judges of the “Supreme Court” and has suspended the Pakistani constitution, pausing or perhaps destroying a very precarious democracy. These actions followed an impending court decision that would have declared Musharraf’s bid for his joint responsibility between a continued presidency and as chief executive of the national armed forces illegal. The state of emergency and martial law will be upheld and maintained at least until the summary elections which Musharraf claims he will hold in early January 2008. How and under what circumstances these elections will occur is not known, without a constitution, it could be as simple as outlawing all other parties before sending out ballots with Musharraf as the only option.

If we were to draft up a list of the 10 or 20 ideal world democracies in this day and age according to popular opinion, I am willing to bet that Pakistan would not be even close to entering the proposed nations. Great political upheaval, presidential assassination attempts, coups, active terrorism and constant racial and religious tensions have long been and remain the plagues of a relatively young country (1948). This new action gives a square punch in the middle of democracy and Musharraf’s explanation for it is a square punch in the face of the Pakistani people. He claims that these drastic actions were taken to preserve democracy and to counter an increasingly violent wave of terrorism. He states: “there is visible ascendancy in the activities of extremists and incidents of terrorist attacks, including suicide bombings, IED [improvised explosive device] explosions, rocket firing and bomb explosions and the banding together of some militant groups have taken such activities to an unprecedented level of violent intensity posing a grave threat to the life and property of the citizens of Pakistan’’ (BBC News Service). This is not very convincing on many levels.

Firstly, if this was even the true and only motive for a state of emergency, it is not a very good one. Revoking the people’s right to vote can only keep the head of state in power, it cannot dissuade, reduce or counter terrorism in any way. Secondly, his initial actions against the supreme judges in the nation’s capital, Islamabad, seem to implicate them directly in the crisis situation. Unfortunately, these judges have not been accused of setting up any explosive equipment or of secretly producing anthrax in the Supreme Court basement. Once again, suspending the judiciary branch of Pakistan’s democracy has no impact on the dissuasion, reduction or countering of terrorism. It HAS some unforeseen and, I’m sure, purely coincidental effects on the presidency.

Primarily, suspending the constitution means the elimination of any elections. Thus, the current head of state, and current head of the national army, remains in place indefinitely, personally names the other magistrates of the country’s institutions and effectively gouverns by decree without any accountability. Furthermore, Musharraf’s sequestering and silencing of the supreme judges mere hours before they could have declared his presidency illegitimate is a fantastic coincidence that permits him to carry out a plan of action against the immediate threat of terrorism…..that has existed for decades. Finally, former Pakistani president and new candidate against General Musharraf, Mrs. Benazir Bhutto, has made a triumphant return to the country after a self-imposed exile. The suspension of the constitution has unforeseeably defeated her democratic bid for the presidency along with her massive supporter base. She is now under house arrest and has survived at least 2 attempts on her life in the last month, reportedly perpetrated by Musharraf’s army corps. Heads of State must be careful when governing by decree, if they are not, all sorts of perverted effects could guarantee their indefinite presidency and eliminate their opposition.

I can elaborate a myriad of examples of burgeoning or unstable democracies that quickly turned to a dictatorship under a charismatic and powerful wolf in sheep’s clothing with righteous sounding motives: Pisistrates overturned a young Athenian democracy and became their tyrant to protect the people from themselves in the 6th century BC, Caius Julius Caesar and Marc Anthony claimed the unlimited dictatorship of Rome to destroy it’s enemies, enemies being whoever opposed them in the 1st century BC, Napoleon Bonaparte 1st became first consul and then emperor of an infant French republic to spread his liberal ideas on the continent (Free yourselves of tyranny by joining my Empire?) in the early 19th century, Vladimir Lenin and Joseph Stalin imposed a communist dictatorship on most Eastern European countries to get rid of the yoke of capitalist democracy in the early 20th century and finally Jimmy Carter financed and sent troops to eliminate a Nicaraguan president (Anastasio Somoza) whom was democratically elected yet socialist, populist and anti-American in the 1970s (the country’s institutions have not fully recovered). The point is, all these people had the best and purest motives…according to themselves. Unfortunately, the small people, you and me, cannot see the genius or dementia that comes into these decisions that seem fundamentally wrong for the world and generally bad for us.

I don’t know about you but I feel that president/general/supreme overlord Musharraf, along with these significant historical personalities, are feeding me grapes with one hand and stabbing me with the other. Suspending the constitution was clearly in the interest of his presidency and ONLY for this goal yet we are made to believe a noble story of anti-terrorist emergency legislation. Keep in mind, Hitler and the German NSDAP claimed that the Jewish populations of the world had to be eliminated to prevent governmental corruption, national treason and to make the European people safe again.


(Pictured: Napoleon 1st and General Pervez Musharraf, they both seem like they can really connect with people)

End.

Friday, November 2, 2007

A Drowning Dollar

November 2nd 2007 – The American dollar keeps plummeting versus other inter- national currencies. After the invasions of Afghanistan and Iraq, the sub-prime mortgage crisis and Armenian genocide row making the price of the oil barrel skyrocket, currencies such as the European Euro, the British Pound and the Canadian dollar have achieved all-time highs against Uncle Sam’s buck and show no sign of stopping.

To give the example of the Canadian dollar, in January of 2002, it was trading against 61.79 cents US. This brought about a plethora of derogative jokes against the ``monopoly money`` that the Canadians used. American media are not so smug anymore; this morning, the Canadian dollar was worth 1.07$ American, an all-time high that denotes a 45 cents rise in the exchange rate in just a few years. Unfortunately, this rise in the value of the Canadian dollar has not been reflected in the prices of gas or consumer goods. This has created a massive consumer exodus to frontier American cities such as Buffalo or Detroit where Canadians are just going wild. A situation that is similar yet properly European is occurring with the Euro.

From a modest starting point of 1 Euro for 1.0015 dollars American in 1999, it proceeded towards a downward plunge to 82.52 American cents for 1 Euro in October of 2000. Following the disastrous economic events of the Bush administration enumerated above, it has climbed to an unbelievable 1.44 American Dollars to buy a single Euro on this Friday before the Celtic New Year. The similarities with Canada include the reticence of big consumer goods to drop their prices. Car companies such as Volkswagen have even pulled back their American ties of production to justify their constant prices. Europe is different in that the small consumer can’t pop over a border to buy American products for a lot less. Their neighbours without the Euro such as the U.K. or Russia have either a higher exchange rate, therefore no advantage or a constantly very low currency, with very high import/export taxes. This just leaves the Great British Pound.

The Pound Sterling has long had one of the highest exchange rates in the world. Nevertheless, the American Dollar has long kept its status of world template because of the overwhelming American share of world production. Once again, primarily for the reasons in my introduction, The Pound has exploded from 1.60 American dollars for 1 Pound to a rate of 2.08 USD for a British Pound. Almost a 50¢ rise in 3 years! This all smells of a recession and possible depression for the American Economy…why does that sound familiar.

Depreciation of world currencies is not a new thing. As an example, I will use the German Deutsch Mark following the unstable 1920s and 1929 crash. After their loss of the First World War and their consequent ``signature`` of the Treaty of Versailles Germany was obliged to make drastic reparation payments to the rest of Europe and to America (132 billion Gold Marks). Furthermore, an unstable republican government (Weimar) forced the country to not only borrow massively from the Americans to pay back a war debt…to the Americans but they were also forced to print ridiculous sums of money that were unjustified. This created a perfect contexte for hyperinflation. In 1922 for example, prices were doubling every 29 hours. When the crash finally hit Wall Street in 1929, the Americans called back all their loans to Germany instantly. Close to a hundred German banks declared bankruptcy and the already worthless Deutsch Mark became less valuable than the paper it was printed on. Try to imagine you are a German entrepreneur that has been saving up 5 DM of his 12 DM weekly pay since 1900. Now, imagine living in 1923, when the Mark reached an all-time low versus the American dollar. 1 USD was trading for 4,200,000,000,000 marks. That’s right, 1 USD for 4.2 TRILLION DM. Your life savings of, perhaps, 5,200 marks (5 DM X 52 weeks X 20 years) are now worth an infinitesimal fraction of an American penny. No wonder suicide then became the national sport. Could the US get all depressed again?

I am not saying that the United-States is heading for hyperinflation of German proportions; it will probably bounce back with a Democrat government. The underlying story here is that it has become obvious that globalisation has brought about a corporate economy that no longer follows world economic rules. I am still paying 15 dollars more in Canada for an American book. Someone must be laughing hysterically as they roll around in piles of Canadian ``monopoly money``.

(Pictured: A 1000 Deutsch Mark Bank note stamped to read 1 million DM - a good old 100$ Bill)

End.

Saturday, October 20, 2007

An Inconvenient Award

October 12th, 2007 – Former United- States vice- president Al Gore was awarded the Nobel Prize for peace along with the Intergov- ernmental Panel on Climate Change (IPCC). These two have won the award "for their efforts to build up and disseminate greater knowledge about man-made climate change and to lay the foundations for the measures that are needed to counteract such change". I would have written about something else yet I am appalled by the lack of criticism such an action has attracted.

The Nobel Peace Prize has always been awarded to an organisation or a person that has advanced, developed or protected what we call ‘peace’. Mr. Gore, apart from winning 2 Oscars for a methodologically questionable documentary, has been touring the world to inform and promote his environmentalist views and the studies he decides to use. I can respect his work since he believes in a cause and works very hard towards imposing his personal beliefs. I thus criticise the Norwegian parliament for awarding a prize for peace to people who talk about slowly melting glaciers and dying penguins. What’s next? Will we give the next ones to great recyclers, amazing scientologists, compelling evolutionists or astounding janitors? I understand that the word peace is malleable but this pushes the limits, especially considering to whom the same prize has been awarded in the past.

Alfred Nobel died in 1896, 5 years before the first prizes were awarded. A rich industrialist and inventor of dynamite, Nobel left a will stating that the peace prize should be given ‘to the person who shall have done the most or the best work for fraternity between the nations, for the abolition or reduction of standing armies and for the holding and promotion of peace congresses", and it has in the past…mostly.

Amongst the winners have been: Jean-Henri Dunant for the foundation of the Red Cross (1901), American President Woodrow Wilson for his participation and promotion of the of the League of Nations (1919), Cordell Hull for his responsibility in the creation of the United Nations (1945), George Catlett Marshall for his ‘Marshall Plan’ (an economic reconstruction plan for a war torn Europe) (1953), Canadian Prime Minister Lester Bowles Pearson for his creation of the Blue Helmet soldier force of the UN (1957), Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. for his pioneering of the non-violent civil rights movement of African-Americans (1964), Desmond Tutu for his strong and non-violent opposition to South-African apartheid (1984), Mikhail Gorbachev for his democratic policies within the Soviet Union and for his efforts of peace towards the West (1990) and Shirin Ebadi for her work for the liberation of women in Iran (2002). This illustrious list (and voluminous sentence) clearly depicts a prize that is quite secondary to the amazing legacy of these people’s work for peace in our time. Mr. Gore’s work…is not so much.

Very little criticism has been received by this topic since environmentalism is this decade’s ‘hot topic’. We sort of ran out of human issues in mainstream politics and in Hollywood (such as war in the 1910s-1950s civil rights in the 1950s-1960s, feminism in the 1970s-1980s, homosexual rights in the 1990s and 2000s) so we had to find something new to feel guilty about. With a lot of research, I was able to fin this quote by a spokesperson for the president of the Czech Republic, Vaclav Klaus: ‘He (Klaus) is somewhat surprised that Al Gore got the Peace Prize, because the relation between his activities and world peace is unclear and indistinct. It rather seems that Gore's questioning of the basic foundation stones of the current civilisation does not contribute to peace much.’ (BBC New Service). I am happy to see that I am not the only one that thinks it IS quite a leap to award our foremost humanitarian prize to an environmentalist. Furthermore, I think we need more reaction about this prize from Africa, Asia and Eastern Europe, regions without the stability and free time that we seem to have. Imagine being the President of Sudan, where a genocidal war has raged for years and where hundreds of diplomats have tried to negotiate peace and where the Red Cross risks their lives every day and where UN peace forces are being shot at despite their neutrality, and then imagine being told that Al Gore won the Nobel Peace Prize for telling the world that our SUVs will make the oceans rise… It would be enough for you to laugh or cry, whilst sitting in a bunker fearing for your life.


All in all, I congratulate Mr. Gore and the IPCC for their win and for the 1.5 million dollars that came with it (in all fairness, Gore donated his half to charity). I am just terribly disappointed that Nobel’s brainchild was used as an apparent political manoeuvre to promote certain ideas. I hear that next year’s nominees will include a man that says rocks have feelings, another who bombs zoos to liberate the animals and another that proved that masturbation makes Jesus cry. As always, I exaggerate and I know the Nobel Peace Prize was a passing piece of news that no one will remember in a week. Mr. Gore’s parade was too sunny; I just had to rain on it.


(Pictured: Alfred Nobel spinning in his grave - Al Gore in his thinner days)


End.

Sunday, October 14, 2007

A faraway holocaust

October 11th, 2007 – The United States Senate has passed a bill recognizing the Armenian genocide of 1915-1917. The result was 27 supporting votes against 21 opposed; it barely was approved despite the appeals of secretary of state Condoleezza Rice (yes, I had to check the spelling) and President George W. Bush himself. The aforementioned politicians implored the senators to vote against the bill stating that: ‘Its passage would do great harm to our relations with a key ally in NATO and in the global war on terror’ (BBC News Service). They are of course referring to the aggressor in this alleged genocide: Turkey.

So if I understand correctly, the Head of State of the, supposedly, most democratic country on earth tried to interfere in the United States’ bicameral system. For those of you who slept through your political science classes (myself included, I had to read up on it later), the US bicameral system involves one gouverning body or ‘house’ whom proposes legislation, another house whom passes legislation and the presidency which has no part in either. Mr. Bush’s and Mrs. Rice’s involvement was actually circumventing their national constitution by their attempted influencing of the democratic process, and for purely political and economic reasons. Our globalized economy and geopolitical environment undoubtedly clashes with the basic principles of the democratic/capitalist system but the president’s lack of tact and subtlety is appalling. Even if Turkey has been a crucial ally in the twentieth century, and with reason, the recognition of any genocide must prevail over all practical reasons; we are not going to deny the Holocaust simply to keep Germany happy and to keep the steady course of Volkswagens and Heineken flowing.

Turkey was, and still is, crucial to any western alliance by its geographic location. By controlling the territory around both the Bosporus and Dardanelle straits, they effectively control all movement between the Mediterranean and Black seas; and thus on every naval enterprise made by our Russian friend/neighbour/nemesis. The cold war is over yet ‘keeping a close eye’ on our neighbours has not fallen out of fashion. Furthermore, this ‘war on terror’ that our British and American partners love painting the media with, has important military installations in Turkey; so it’s usefulness to the West is far from outlived.

I think it is important to establish the international reasons why the President wanted to halt the bill but he forgets that he is of the lowest importance in his country. He executes the orders of the Senate and House of Representatives and they, in turn, take their orders from the citizens (or at least this is how it should work). To his credit, Mr. Bush did correctly forebode the Turkish reaction; President Abdullah Gul responded to the action with these weighted and not at all overdramatic words of wisdom: ‘This unacceptable decision of the committee, like similar ones in the past, is not regarded by the Turkish people as valid or of any value’ (BBC News Service). This begs the question: how can a matter be unacceptable and of no value at the same time? As I mentioned earlier, this Armenian genocide is a very sensitive matter that Turkey rejects unilaterally, not surprising as they were the aggressors.

To provide some context about a little known country, Armenia is a small country of the ex U.S.S.R. that gained independence in the 1991 break-up. It is landlocked and is quite poor in natural resources. Its economy is heavily based in agriculture as well as primary industry and has been bullied by American, Russian and even Chinese powers who have been trying to establish their sphere of influence onto another peripheral region of the Middle East. During the First World War, Armenia was invaded by the Ottoman Empire, an Islamic establishment whom sided with Germany and subsequently lost their Empire along with the war. The invasion resulted in the deaths of approximately 1.5 million Armenians. Considering that today, their population is 3.2 million; the sheer percentage of their nationality that perished constitutes genocide, regardless of intent and organisation. The thing is, the Ottomans failed to take over the entire Caucasus region in the war and blamed the Russian-siding Armenians; the subsequent intent to punish adds the elusive element of motive to the genocide verdict reached that some (22) countries have assigned to Turkey.

All in all, whether or not anyone recognises the semantic assignation we have given this event, something very bad happened to these people and if we can ease their search for closure, neither President Bush nor President Gul can prevent our collective effort to do so. Finally, It means nothing but the ‘end is coming ’ Blog, representing exactly 1 person, officially recognizes the Armenian Genocide of 1915-1917.
(Pictured: A gravesite of Armenian genocide victims - A shifty looking Abdullah Gul, President of Turkey)

End.




Wednesday, October 3, 2007

Soft Cells

October 1st 2007 – The Canadian ‘tainted blood scandal’ ended with the acquittal of four Canadian doctors and of an American drug company. They had been charged with criminal negligence that led to the infection of at least 20,000 patients with the HIV and hepatitis C viruses. The original accusations were brought against the doctors in 1985 and a cool 22 years later, the victims are still sick, the doctors and the drug company cannot clean their blemished record and the Canadian judicial system is missing a few million dollars.

I don’t know how to begin to criticise a 22 year trial but as we will see later, it seems to be the standard length in this type of case. That’s right; there have been so many that a trend can be established. Furthermore, I question the initial accusation that these doctors are to blame if their parent company does not have a 100% efficient screening method for the gallons of blood that are donated every week. Nothing is 100%: condoms are 96% effective, a vegetable oil powered car still emits damaging fumes, diet sprite still contains high levels of sodium, Gandhi was still unbelievably racist towards the black populations of South Africa and a day is always slightly less than exactly 24 hours, requiring intermittent leap seconds. The victims have been infected with horrible diseases but without them being able to prove that the screening process was not carried out because the doctors went to lunch early, the physicians did their job and the tragedy happened anyway. It happens all over the world, is quite frequent and the verdict is almost always positive for the accused.

To give a first example, in 2003, 30 French officials and health workers were acquitted of very much the same charges. In this case, thousands of people were infected with the HIV virus in 1985 yet the courts could not prove that there was ‘intent to cause death’. Among the indicted were the former prime minister, Laurent Fabius and the social affairs minister, Edmond Hervé. When the verdict was announced, it caused a massive outrage amongst the victims that had survived the 18 years of the trial. Some jurors were even harassed with shouts of ‘Shame on you, you haven't even read the file... We will remember your names’ (BBC News Service, 2003). Just like the Canadian case, the doctors cannot be accused of a terrible flaw of the blood transmission system, or can they?

As a final example, I cite the tainted blood scandal that implicated 7 Bulgarian health workers in 1991. They were accused of voluntarily giving AIDS blood to 428 children in a Libyan hospital. The trial still took over 12 years and in 2004, 6 of them were condemned to death by hanging. Without wanting to generalise, Libya is not the most liberal, impartial and fair country on earth so the accusation and the investigation seem completely fraudulent to me. The medics confessed under torture to their accusations and no amount of appeals could save them. They say justice is blind but she sure likes jewellery. In an ingenious publicity stunt, the new French President in 2007, Nicolas Sarkozy negotiated the release of the prisoners by paying a massive donation to Libya’s AIDS children fund (secretly called the PPF or ‘Presidential Party Fund). Libya was not so happy a few days later when France flew the prisoner back to their native Bulgaria; where they were immediately pardoned and let free by the Bulgarian Prime Minister. They get to live with their nightmarish memories of Libyan prisons, among other things.


They, as well as the French and Canadian officials and medics must live with the memory of giving tainted blood to hopeful patients and indirectly causing widespread death and suffering. They didn’t do it on purpose but it did happen and they failed to prevent it. As much as I am happy to see that they were all acquitted, I believe that the axiom ‘be careful, not sorry’ applies in this situation.

(Pictured: Some blood being weighed - a stylised HIV virus)

End.

Sunday, September 23, 2007

It's a bird! it's a plane! it's GORE!

September 15th 2007 – In Shoreham U.K. this week, an experienced pilot and airfield manager (Brian Brown) was killed during a WW2 reenactment at an air show; his plane crashed into a hill in front of 20,000 onlookers. Earlier this month, in Radom Poland, two pilots in light aircrafts ran into each other at another air show; both were killed as a result of aerial acrobatics gone bad. Finally, in Late July, at the end of a Wisconsin air show, two pilots ``clipped wings`` upon landing at the closing of the show; once more, the aircrafts were WW2 relics that fell apart killing one of the pilots and severely injuring the other one. I could easily draft a dissertation of these occurrences; needless to say they are frequent and international.

These are surely very tragic events and the victims are people with grieving families yet I simply must advance my hypothesis that these talented people died in an unnecessary and futile way. Some people can paint or play music, some can master foreign languages or calculate logarithms in their minds….and then there are those who can juggle chainsaws, wrangle lions or fly a small and old plane really fast and really close to another oncoming tin can. These last ``talents`` aim to entertain us by performing death-defying stunts which we could never dream of living through. The problem is, we don’t WANT to attempt such a thing because of the words DEATH-DEFYING. The term also applies to activities such as: throwing rocks at a bear in the forest, drinking a tall glass of detergent, going down Niagara Falls in a wooden barrel, telling Vladimir Putin of Russia he looks like Dobby the house-elf or pretending to hide nuclear weapons in the Middle-East. Everyone will be very surprised and entertained to know how you lived through it but it would take some truly morbid fans to watch the activity in action…with their children, a beer and some popcorn. They are at the edge of their seat, waiting for some really cool stuff.

We rarely hear about chainsaw jugglers cut to pieces in front of amused children but a fatal plane crash at an air show no longer seems possible, it seems probable. I accuse the pilots of risking their lives simply for the adrenaline rush of entertaining the working classes. Furthermore, I heavily criticize and judge the attending spectators that gawk at an accident waiting to happen. The deceased pilots could have been valued and talented members of a military organization and when they would have died in action, a general would have given their national flag to their widows saying ‘he was a great man, he made a difference, he died defending what he believed in’’. It is with such a tragic subject that historic distance can provide some welcomed comic relief.

Morbid curiosity such as the fans attending an air show is not a product of the XXth century. We must travel back through the ages of tightrope walking over waterfalls, Medieval jousting or throwing some slaves to the lions in the Roman coliseum to see some truly disturbing events. It is by trekking backwards through history that we encounter highly fluctuating levels of morbidity AND curiosity. British history, for example, is drenched in very questionable entertainment.

In Tudor England (1485-1603), perhaps the bloody conflicts with Holland, France and Spain as well as horrid living standards, overwhelming taxation and constant epidemics created this morbid curiosity that the English revelled in at the time (contemporary analysts would probably blame violent movies or video games). This period was the birthplace of ``bear baiting``, a ``sport`` where a bear was sedated, tied to a sturdy post at the center of an arena and left to fight off rabid wolves that were unleashed upon it. No no, I know what you are thinking, ``surely this was an obscure activity that was performed secretly by the poor masses``, but unfortunately, this was as popular and attended as NFL football, NBA basketball or FIFA Soccer. Actually, Shakespeare’s famous Globe Theatre was only half of a larger entertainment complex; the other half was a bear-baiting arena. Queen Elizabeth I herself was quite fond of the macabre spectacle. This being Elizabethan England, they got bored quite fast, so they made the show more interesting by blinding the bear with acid beforehand or pitting the bear against more exotic monsters such as elephants or hippopotamuses (or is it hippopotami); now that’s some good comic relief.

All in all, I personally like being entertained by the taboo and the morbid but that’s what cartoons and movies are for, use your imagination people! If you can’t, TV and books can do that for you. A person, especially one with potential, should never have to walk to an early grave for such a stupid reason and at this point, the other people that come to watch, make me wish we never tore down the bear-baiting arenas of England.

(Pictured: A grizzly bear who has the awesome Latin name ursus arktos horribilis - F16s over New York)

End.

Sunday, September 16, 2007

Summer 2007 poll results

After an overw- helming response.. ......the survey revealed that a majority of readers have chosen Russia/ USSR as having the bloodiest history. There was no right or wrong answer since Russia and China have never been straightforward with their official records. With the violent formation of Russian states during the middle ages, the Crimean war, the Russo-Japanese war, WW1, the Russian revolutions of 1917, WW2, the cold war, the Afghan conquest, the repression of Hungarian and Czech revolutions and the Yugoslav secession wars, it has hosted a panoply of violent, unfortunate and sometimes unprovoked attacks. One way or another, Russia/USSR is a main contender for the unfortunate epithet that my readers have given it.

RUSSIA/USSR
BLOODIEST HISTORY
2007

End.

Thursday, September 13, 2007

Downfall by lack of commitment

September 12th 2007 – One day after the sixth unfortunate anniversary, two primary world powers announced major changes. Firstly, after less than a year in power, Japanese Prime Minister Shinzo Abe has resigned from office without explanation or warning. Secondly, my favourite butcher of Grozny, Vladimir Putin of Russia, declared that “it was necessary to shake things up for the upcoming elections”. This statement came as an explanation for his dissolution of parliament and expulsion of the current Prime Minister. Furthermore, Putin named his own Prime Minister, Viktor Zubkov, and is publicly backing him as the heir to the Russian presidency. These affronts to democracy (by abandonment or deliberate violation) could be devastating to the burgeoning democracies and more importantly, will probably inspire doubt in the democratic process for the affected nations.

Firstly, the Japanese situation is quite shocking considering that elections are nowhere near on the calendar and thus, the nation must replace the gouvernemnt by interim. Abe’s succession will be very difficult; seeing as Japan's constitutional monarchy is infinitely complex, it contains subtle pitfalls and traps that are, I think, inherent to the Japanese people. Speculation is running wild about his reasons and/or motivations. I think it might be safe to say that it has to do with the massive financial scandal in the agricultural/national production sector of his administration and the subsequent suicide of his minister of agriculture. Furthermore, with the following two agriculture ministers who were forced to resign after “financial irregularities” were noticed. Finally, with Abe’s defence minister was forced to resign after he announced that the 1945 Nagasaki and Hiroshima Bombing were “inevitable”. Today, Sept. 13th, he has apparently checked into a hospital citing “extreme exhaustion”. I don’t buy it but at least he didn’t commit suicide out of shame, which has become a very serious problem in Japan. Exhausted or not, Japan cannot afford this unnannounced abandonment of the democratic process. Abe did not die, he simply left everyone high and dry without any worry for succession or legacy. The japanese resolve for democracy is thus weakened from an already frail state.

Secondly, if you’ve followed my blog, you have seen the many ways in which Putin makes frequent controversial decisions and also, the ways in which he disregards international opinion about these. This latest measure taken by the Kremlin reeks of unconstitutionality; Putin has effectively deposed rival parties and installed his successor. I say he doesn’t care what we (westerners) think; I believe this is quite obvious when the best explanation he can come up with is “shaking things up”. He sure did. He takes us (international public) seriously enough not to lie to us, but that makes him even scarier on the geopolitical map… and even more evil looking as a person (in a bond villain kind of way).

These unforeseen shifts in national strength, especially within Russia, can have incredible and revolutionary effects. I say especially in Russia because it would not be the first time that the reigning man has dissolved or disregarded the authority of their senate/parliament called the Duma. In 1917, the last Tsar, Nicholas II Romanov, dissolved the Duma to avoid confrontation or debate on his rulings, an unwise choice. When the people protested in the streets in front of the St. Petersburg Winter Palace, Nicolas orderd the army to kill them all, a stupid choice. The army choose NOT to shoot their brothers and friends and turned against the gouvernment. I bet he didn’t know that it would lead to the February/march revolution, the Bolshevik takeover, Russia’s withdrawal from WW1, Stalin’s despotism, the Cold War, the Cuban missile crisis, the erection of the Berlin wall, JFK’s assassination, Roswell 1947, the disappearance of Amelia Earhart, the breakup of Ross and Rachel and the removal of Terry Schiavo’s feeding tube…. or maybe only the first few. Sorry, US history has taught me that it can be quite easy and patriotic to blame everything on the commies.

To make my point simple, repressing the fragile democratic process, as in Russia, or abandoning it in the face of adversity, as in Japan, can lead to confusion and lack of faith in the ideology. Russia’s democracy, or the facade they frequently present, is precarious enough without this exercise of red muscle. Authoritarianism will only lead to restrictions in democracy and increasing violent measures…by its nation and its administration. In parallel, Japan’s very young democracy was built on nuclear ruins and military dictatorship. Lack of constant vigilance will do nothing to maintain a tentative liberal democracy.

If you can't take the heat, get out of the way for someone else to take place, if you are a violent psychopath..........please don't send the KGB after me.

(Pictured: The Kremlin, overtaken by the bolshevik militia in 1917 - A very tired Shinzo Abe)


End.

Thursday, September 6, 2007

The cult of the leader

August 22nd 2007 – French magazine Paris Match has airbrushed a picture of French Prime Minister Nicolas Sarkozy. He was canoeing shirtless and a subtle love handle was digitally removed to polish the iconic image of the French leader. Recently, European media raved about the good shape and physical health of President Vladimir Putin as he was seen strolling through rural Russia…shirtless once again. The media have never been far from these seemingly nonchalant, yet extremely photogenic, vacationing figureheads.

We seem to be back to the absolutist age all of a sudden. Does a love handle imply that our leader will lead the country to financial ruin? Does a flabby chest mean degrading international relations? Does a sturdy and solid build guarantee a strong military organisation for a Nation? OF COURSE NOT! Therefore, the only other alternative implies that governments take us for idiots. They are trying to add a metaphysical aspect to their administration by controlling the physical/metaphorical image of its leader. This process has been called the “cult of the leader” by French historian Michel Winock. I should clarify that this last author actually qualified this concept as one of the six characteristics of totalitarian fascism.

In the 1920s, when Benito Mussolini took power in Italy, his fascist dictatorship greatly incorporated this notion. Mussolini’s office in Rome would always be lit, not to pretend as if he was always working, but to assert that he actually WAS always working. It is a process of semi-deification; the leader was superhuman and thus, was untouchable. Furthermore, “Il Duce”, as he was called, would tour the country to visit the rural and distant estates of his domain. He would then take off his shirt, pick up a scythe and harvest wheat with the farmers for a full day without stopping. Such feats of strength provided an idyllic and undefeatable figure (even icon), and therefore, these characteristics would apply to Italy. Also, it made the superman apparently immune to mistakes, demagogy and assassination attempts.

The Cult of the leader was greatly important in the fascist ideology because the “guide” was not a representative of the nation or its people; he WAS the nation and WAS the people. It rendered democracy redundant and unnecessary.

Sarkozy, Putin and maybe even George W. Bush being photographed on a Texas ranch have adopted this subtle attempt and superhuman status, a cleaver boost to the solidity of their respective administrations. There is nothing wrong with this and you could argue that it is absolutely harmless. I just don’t LIKE being taken for an idiot, do you?

(Pictured: Mussolini posing for a statue-like keepsake - the incredible Sarkozy and his incredible, disappearing flab.)


End.

Wednesday, August 22, 2007

Flexing a red muscle.

August 17th, 2007 – In a mounting display of force and effrontery, Russia has pulled another antagoni- sing stunt. President Vladimir Putin’s administration has reinstated long-range strategic surveillance, a measure that was abolished 15 years ago at the end of the cold war. Furthermore, these Tupolev-type bombers are taunting international powers by venturing a bit too close to their borders. So Far, these patrols have grazed the Alaskan North, the Canadian North and Scotland. The large American base in Guam was also flown over. Russia seems to be testing America, Canada and the U.K.'s resolves regarding contested land. They also seem to be demonstrating a fact that has been obvious many times through history, never underestimate or take your eye off of Russia.

This burst of tension began 2 month ago when Putin retracted Russia’s signature from cold war pacts, deplored an American-European missile defence pact and failed to sign the renewed Conventional Forces in Europe Treaty (CFE). This last piece of paper, aimed at the restriction in size of arms deposits and military personnel, was first signed in 1990 and was the culmination of Bush Sr.’s and Gorbatchev’s peace effort. Finally, a week ago, controversy broke out about the proprietorship of the Canadian North and the North Pole waters. These are rich with oil deposits and a retracting ice cap means an accessible terrain. Canada and Denmark are conducting negotiations while Russia has sent a mechanised mission to plant an underwater flag in the contested region; how very imperial. Although the action is dismissed as childish by Western powers, I see this as a very clear and very historically Russian sign of unwavering determination. The lines of conflict are being drawn.

With his withdrawal from this crucial pact and with his refusal to renew such a stalemate peace agreement, Putin will be free to start rebuilding a massive arsenal. This will lead to a similar effort by Western countries as well as by some new nuclear players such as India and Pakistan. You may call me overdramatic but we have just discovered joint military exercises between Russia (Oil, money, technology), Kazakhstan (Oil, land) and China (Money, Manpower, Communism). Not an axis of Evil but rather an Axis of essential military resources. I wish somebody with much more muscle than me would take serious notice of this. As some of you may remember, negligence and a laissez-faire attitude have recently been disastrous to the very same continent.

In 1933, a democratically elected Nazi party took control of the German Chancellery; some were concerned but were mostly content with a pro-business, anti-communist new neighbour. In 1936, Hitler re-militarized the Rhineland, directly breaking a stipulation of the WW1 peace treaty (Versailles). A gutsy move but the Western powers understood that this western province was, after all, IN Germany and populated by Germans. Later that year, Germany formally allied with Italy, creating a massive demographic and economic fascist bloc. “A new trading partner!”, people would say. Using the same logic as with the Rhineland, in 1938, the Nazis took over Austria and annexed it to Germany. The West agreed that Austrians WERE German and thus the move was shunned. Finally, when Hitler wanted parts of Czechoslovakia containing 3 million Germans (Sudetenland), they had to do SOMETHING. They sent British Prime Minister Neville Chamberlain to warn Hitler that he was not to transgress any more international borders and that any more belligerences would be met by unilateral military and economic response. At least, this is what should have happened in my head. In reality, Chamberlain signed a treaty with Hitler that gave a foreign land, inhabited by the Czech Germans, to Germany if they stopped their Empire building after that. I personally place this Munich accord near the top of a list of stupid treaties.

As Hitler was building in Germany, Mussolini was invading Africa and Japan was pillaging China, all that the international community would do was sit back, smile and impose a 5% restriction on cotton imports for this or that bad country. This is giving a slap on the hand to a child that stole 1 billion dollars worth pf Ethiopian resources, raped an entire Chinese village and was home in time to invade Poland.

It is a popular saying that we learn from our mistakes but it isn’t true. It is just a quaint notion that portrays human kind in a kinder light than we deserve.

Last week, with the revelation of these joint-military exercises and the reinstatement of bomber patrols, the American reaction was the one I was ready for. “In Washington, state department spokesman Sean McCormack played down the significance of Russia's move, saying: "We certainly are not in the kind of posture we were with what used to be the Soviet Union. If Russia feels as though they want to take some of these old aircraft out of mothballs and get them flying again, that's their decision," he told reporters.” (BBC News Service). The Russian efforts at antagonism are met with ridicule and marginality by it’s once, bitter rival. It is a bold non-move by the American Nation that was three years late in joining WW1 AND WW2, out of sight, out of mind.

People don’t learn, governments, doubly so. I don’t recycle because I will be dead in 100 years when things will get really bad. Governments have a lifespan of 4-10 years and thus apply this same logic to justify their laissez-faire attitude and lack of foresight. I’m off to build a bunker…

(Pictured:1936 parade for Mussolini's Visit to Berlin - Vladimir Putin at a parade for the remembrance of the 25 million fallen Russian soldiers of WW2)

End.

Tuesday, August 7, 2007

The words are mightier than the pen

For this week, I offer you the following, an excerpt from the book I am working on. It is a book of historical lists and contains common and uncommon knowledge from antiquity to today.




Most influential speeches in History

This list illustrates my personal choice of groundbreaking and influential speeches in Western history. It would be naive to think that these speeches single-handedly affected change. I propose that these jewels of oratory are the voicing of social, political and cultural trends at the time.

1. Moses – c. 1250 BC – The 10 commandments (The basis of Western law)

2. Cicero – 63 BC – Conjuration of Catilina (He foiled a Roman coup d’État and prosecuted its conspirators. Thus, the law and justice prevailed over summary judgements.)

3. Jesus – c. 33 AD – Blessed are the poor in spirit (This speech elaborated the following 2000 years in Western morality.)

4. Elizabeth 1st – Aug 9th 1588 – I have the heart and stomach of a king (Upon taking personal command of the defence of England against the invading Spanish Armada, the Queen gave this speech. It stands as a testament to female authority and power.

5. William Wilberforce – May 12th 1789 – Let us make reparations to Africa (This man and this speech pioneered the movement for the abolition of slavery throughout the British Empire. It was finally accomplished in 1809)

6. Maximilien de Robespierre – Dec. 3rd 1792 – Louis must perish because our country must live (This speech elaborated and justified the violent downfall of European monarchies through the promotion of the ideas of the Enlightenment. This led to the following 50 years in which Europe formed nations and renounced absolute, divine-right monarchy)

7. Thomas Jefferson – March 4th 1801 – Equal and exact justice to all men (Dressed in plain clothes and without escort, this American president’s inaugural address emphasized the class-blindness of the law.)

8. Abraham Lincoln – Nov. 19th 1863 – Gouvernment of the people, by the people and for the people (This oration is the most quoted in history. It confirmed the holy and ethical virtue of liberty and equality among men.)

9. Vladimir Illyich Lenin – April 15th 1917 – Long live the World Socialist revolution (When philosophers theorised about equality among men, Lenin promoted the violent overthrow of the established order to accomplish it.)

10. Winston Churchill – June 18th 1940 – This was their finest hour (Amidst the preparations for the imminent invasion of Britain by the Nazis, Churchill defiantly reiterated the undying courage and valour of democracy in the face of tyranny.)

11. Dr. Martin Luther King – August 28th 1963 – I have a dream (Dr. King proudly shouted his hope that racial discrimination should fall as the last major bastion of ignorance.)

End.

Sunday, July 29, 2007

Drinking and driving in a spaceship is probably not as cool as it sounds.

July 27th 2007 – A panel set up by the American National Aeronautics and Space Agency (NASA) has discovered that at least two astronauts, on two separate missions, were inebriated upon takeoff. They were cleared to fly, even though they broke the 12 hour pre-flight sobriety rule. The panel report (http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/shared/bsp/hi/pdfs/27_07_07_nasa.pdf) recommends much more strict and frequent physical, psychological and psychiatric testing for astronauts with an approaching flight. Furthermore, the panel wisely recommends that NASA reviews if said testing and data collection is accomplished following established guidelines and procedures. To summarize it all, the panel is telling NASA that they screwed up and that it has no idea what new regulations to implement to avoid future problems.

I certainly agree that, to fly a billion dollar spacecraft out of our atmosphere and into the vacuum of space, one must be at the apex of his physical and mental efficiency. On the human side, I can’t condemn these pilots too much; they were ABOUT TO FLY A BILLION-DOLLAR SPACECRAFT OUT OF OUR ATMOSPHERE AND INTO THE VACUUM OF SPACE! The levels of fear, stress, denial and disbelief probably give a secondary use to the adult diapers they were wearing.

Perhaps this is not an excuse to cool down nerves with some Bourbon, but surely, the media have blown this story out of proportion. I accuse them of not taking two crucial facts into account. Firstly, these astronauts were declared fit to pilot the darn thing an hour before takeoff. I trust that the inspectors clearing them were not also drinking and that they knew what they were doing. This supposition, in turn, suggests that these pilots were not staggering about and vomiting in their helmets as they climbed the ladder to the hatch. I question the amount of alcohol that the media equate to ‘being drunk’. Secondly, the media uses the term pilot as it applies to a car or bicycle driver. This second faulty supposition denies the existence of a multitude of on-ground specialists and millions of dollars worth of automated subroutines operating the craft. Much like an airline pilot, the astronaut pilot’s primary function is to supervise the smooth unfolding of the operation and to maintain constant vigilance, should anything fail. The correct analogy would be the passenger in a car, not the driver; should the driver experience a heart attack, fatigue or explosive decompression, the passenger can jump into action to remedy the situation and return the vehicle to a safe location. My point is that the spacecraft, which these accused men piloted, did not swerve upon take-off and hit a tree as in cartoons.

Alcohol as a quick method of tension-relief has been historically present since the dawn of sedentary man, 10000 years ago. Homer’s Iliad and Odyssey are packed with references to heavy drinking the night (or even the meal) before an attack on the walled city of Troy. No one got to sleep in because of a hangover; they had to go risk their lives for a pointless personal endeavour (see http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trojan_war). Closer to our time period, rum (or grog) was the chosen nectar on circumnavigational voyages of the 16th and 17th centuries. It kept longer than water and provided a brief respite for the sailors who lost captain Magellan in the Philippines, halfway through their quest; for massive amounts of colonists to the new world, tortured by scurvy; and for Davis, Cabot and Frobisher’s men, frostbitten by a fruitless endeavour to fin a northwest passage through the Canadian north. Could they have persevered and survived through these harsh times without it? Of course! Can you dig a hole with your hands even if you have a shovel handy? Sure. As my dad always said ‘Work hard, party hard’.

I am not excusing the astronauts, I am understanding them. I would personally be fired for showing up inebriated at my place of work so my understanding has its limits. You have to work hard BEFORE you party hard.

(Pictured: Dionysos, god of wine and festivities, tempting mortals with the substance - Space shuttle Columbia launching in April 1981)


End.

Sunday, July 22, 2007

If I lock myself in here and close my eyes, nothing can hurt me.

July 9th, 2007 – German Interior minister Wolfgang Schäuble has proposed a radical plan to render anti-terrorism laws stricter for his nation. Among other measures, Schäuble proposed the phone-tapping and computer monitoring of suspected terrorists. This implies a lack of warrant or accountability. Officers and offices would be free to create their own criteria for what a suspect should be. Furthermore, the minister (whom hails from the Christian Democratic Union) suggests a clear law that would allow certain established terrorists to be assassinated without trial. Wolfgang gives the example of Osama bin Laden but such a law could easily lead people to take justice into their own hands against an enemy, or someone that looked like him, ‘it was dark, I thought his cane was a shotgun, I swear he had a beard…’ with obviously disastrous consequences.

This news story is not the easiest to find due to the controversy it is reeking on the German administration. Among others, the Chancellor, Angela Merkel, has denounced these declarations as extreme and tactless. I can actually see both sides of the issue. Schäuble often quotes the United-States patriot act that allows the same measures that he is proposing; he claims to want to take every possible precaution to prevent a terrorist attack. Unfortunately, doing so in this manner would encroach on the very foundations of contemporary democracy. To spy on, detain or assassinate a person without trial or universal procedure contradicts the ‘innocent until proven guilty’ principle and has the potential for unlimited abuse. In parallel, we mustn’t forget the code of Hammurabi in c. 1800 BC and the laws of Solon in Greece (c. 610 BC); these were breakthroughs for humanity. For the first time, law was universal and could not be modified by the whims of administrators or the bribes of offenders. The United-States passed such a law after a traumatic and horrifying event in 2001, the German parliament (Bundestag) has gone through no such tragedy and thus are appalled and shaken at the prospect of losing certain liberties in the name of anti-terrorism.

Such a measure of ‘shoot on site without punishment’ was once implemented to weed out the enemies of the state. In ancient Rome, amidst a bevy of civil wars, power struggles and international aggression, the Senate would allow or even mandate certain Senatus Consultum Ultimum. Being the most important and official decree of this institution, it would allow the murder of a public enemy without trial or without consequences for the assassin. The statute of ‘public enemy’ was determined by VERY biased and influenced people who, in no way, held justice as the highest value to protect. In the 120s BC, two such decrees allowed the murders of the Gracchi brothers. They were enemies of the state because of several reforms the proposed: redistribution of wealth and land, sharing of power between rich patricians and the working classes, etc. At the worst part of the civil wars and at the terminal point of the Roman Republic, the Senate passed a Senatus Consultum Ultimum on Caesar’s head. Following this, Caesar took Rome, chased out the senate, formed a new one and got them to reverse the decree. These warranted assassinations usually worked but constantly and progressively lead the way to more drastic and tyrannical laws.

Such drastic and anti-democratic laws, in the present as in the past, by a government that is inherently not objective leads to abuse, unequal application of justice and general weakening of the democratic civilisation we have become. I applaud the complete rejection of Schäuble’s ideas and encourage him to find another drastic way to deal with terrorist potential without breaking constitutional and democratic essentials.

(Pictured: The Roman Senate at the time of Cicero - c. 60 BC - Guatanamo Bay, Cuba, a detention centre for untried terrorist suspects)

End.